Two Harvards

My friend Joe had a theory about Harvard. He claimed there were actually two Harvards: there was the Harvard that minority and middle-to-lower class students went to and then there was the real Harvard. You know, the Harvard you see in movies and read about in books, the one with the snooty young guys in cigar clubs sipping cognac, waited on by Butlers named Jeeves, and going out with girls named Bambi and Muffy. These were the kids who never showed up to class, yet always seemed best buddies with the professors and ended up getting B+'s without doing any work.

I mean, you think rich people would really allow their kids to eat dining hall food? No, they had their own special dining hall in some sequestered location. All those finals clubs that were supposedly frowned upon by the University were in fact the real Harvard. And after graduation, these kids would join their dads at the Goldman Sachs and Skadden Arps of the world. I can only hope that one day my kids will be granted access into this world of undeserved privilege. Only then will I know that I have achieved the American dream. Of course, this means that I will have to marry white so that my kids can at least look the part. I wonder if Ann Coulter would make a good wife?

I have no fucking clue where I'm going with all this either. This is what 16 hours of work and painkillers will do to you.

Quote of the day:
Nick: Man, before Ashlee, I used to have this thing against untalented pop stars like J Lo. Now I realize that attractive, untalented pop stars are so much better than unattractive, untalented pop stars.

Hours spent at work today: 16
# of Pushups done today: 100
Monopoly Card says: Go directly to jail. Do not pass GO. Do not collect $200. Doh.