California Board of Tourism

Ok, here's a pitch to the California Board of Tourism. Jaded Bostonian moves to San Francisco. Has spent 29 years in Boston. First move of his sentient life out of Boston. Every week, he does one random act of tourism in Northern California. Writes a blog post / article about his experiences. Hopefully, the West Coast melts away his cynicism and he rediscovers the joy of life on the Golden Coast. Tourism to CA from jaded East Coasters increases 10x. CA budget crisis resolved. Yes/ no?

Ok, far fetched, but since I am new here, this might not be a bad way of getting to know the area. It also has the side benefit of preventing me from becoming overly acquainted with the neighborhood Safeway (which is where I've spent a considerable amount of time since moving here. On the other hand, I recently discovered they have great deals on Jagermeister). Since these events of tourism will be random, I prefer not to do an extensive amount of planning and just go where the whim strikes. First random act this past weekend: the Legion of Honor.

Apparently, the Legion of Honor is an art museum in San Francisco. Now, for some context, I'm not a big art person. Sure I can throw around some names, but I would hardly call myself an appreciator of the fine arts. To some extent, the modern world and the ease of art production has devalued the old stuff. Sure, this Roman statue looks impressive, but the one in the lobby of Caesar's in Vegas looks just like it! I remember going to the Chihuly exhibit at the Museum of Fine Arts back in Boston and thinking to myself "wow, this is like a Pottery Barn catalog." Sad but true. (Side note: Watching a friend on a mildly awkward non-date at Chihuly was actually much more entertaining than the exhibit itself). So with that as pretext, let's just say expectations were not high. I chose this place primarily because it had a cool sounding name. Whatever your feelings on art, "Legion of Honor" just sounds more bad ass than "[Random Benefactor X] Museum of Art."

Turns out this place is really far out there in SF (as in far away from where I live). 

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Also since San Francisco public transit blows, there's no train that goes there. Just the bus. So car it is. Incidentally, this the first time I've driven in over a month in San Francisco (on a related note, my car battery completely died in the meantime, requiring a mini adventure in SOMA last week, but I digress). On my way there, traffic was stopped by what seemed like a holiday parade (there were people in Santa costumes), but I got confused when a band of Mexicans in sombreros on donkeys rode pass. San Francisco is weird. (Side note: I later found out that SantaCon was that day, which explained the scantily-dressed Santa's interspersed throughout the city. I had just assumed they were normal San Franciscans going about their everyday business. After all, if there's one thing I can definitely say after two months here, it's that San Franciscans are weird. It's hard to overstate this.)

The Legion is located high up on a hill next to the Presidio. It's in a park where there are hiking trails (and a golf course) And of course, there's a stunning view of the ocean and the Golden Gate Bridge. This brings up some other things that I've learned in my two months here: 1) Scenic views are a dime a dozen. It's hard not to get used to them. After a point, you're like "Yawn, another gorgeous sunset scene. Wake me up when something really interesting happens, like Magneto lifting the Golden Gate Bridge to create a bridge to Alcatraz." 2) People love their hiking here. When you ask people what they do for fun, they invariably bring up hiking or some other outdoorsy activity. As a native Bostonian where the official fall activity is "drink beer and watch football" this is very disturbing to me.

The view from outside the Legion of Honor. 

Upon reaching the entrance, you're confronted with the famous Rodin sculpture, "The Thinker." I admit, this is a pretty impressive courtyard and makes a great first impression. I originally assumed that this "Thinker" was a very nice replica. After my journey through the museum, I discovered that the Legion actually has an extensive Rodin collection, leading me to believe that the courtyard statue was the original one and thereby increasing my "amazed factor" by upwards of 10%. However, after returning home and hitting up Wikipedia, I learned that the true original is in Paris and that the one outside the Legion is just an original replica, if that makes any sense. So I'm less amazed again.

The Thinker

Entrance fee was a reasonable $10 ($15 if you want the Picasso upsell, which I naturally declined). Museum has your standard collection of European artsy stuff and is not overly large. I blitzed through all the rooms in a pretty efficient hour, only really pausing for what I found to be intriguing. Like for instance drinkware!

Tankard

Fancy Highball Glass

The museum has a collection of drinkware from the early 17th century, and I found this fascinating because: 1) the drin ware is pretty much the same as what we use today; 2) it shows how long human beings have been drinking; 3) the size indicates that "American" sizing is not actually a new trend and that Germans have been supersizing beer for way longer. They should just really call it "tankard" size.

The next exhibit that really stood out, as I happen to like ancient mythologies, was Bernini's Medusa. Here we see Medusa in the process of metamorphosis from gorgeous babe to snake-headed monster who turns men to stone and all the requisite anguish it entails. The story is that while she was hooking up with Poseidon in Athena's temple, she got busted by Athena ("It wasn't me?"). Getting turned into a snake headed monster was her punishment. Bummer.

Bernini's Medusa

After a whole bunch of creepy religious paintings, the next thing that I found cool was the Impressionist wing.  I really liked the painting "The Absinthe Drinkers". This handy quote pretty much sums it up: "The figural types in The Absinthe Drinkers are described as 'poverty-stricken wrecks' with 'such a particular character of suffering and of revolt, such a poignant color of melancholy.' The appeal of this gritty image is its grand portrayal of the devastating addiction to the powerful drink absinthe." Again, signs that we as a people have been consoling ourselves in drink for a long time. (Side note: I was also reminded of my friend's asinine plan to drink 31 beers on his 31st birthday, but that's another story).

Absinthe Drinkers

After fully exploring the first floor (there was also a "Mourners" special exhibit that I was not allowed to photograph), I went downstairs where there was the entrance to the special exhibit I did not pay to see (bastards!), some porcelain, and the requisite gift shop and cafe. This being the art museum, the cafe was stereotypically snooty (wine and foods I can't pronounce) and filled with older people. Having pretty much exhausted the museum at that point, I decided to leave, but not before checking out this dude again. (This is when I thought that this "Thinker" statue was the original, and therefore took another picture because of my increased level of "being impressed". I am retroactively disappointed that this was not, indeed, the true original).

In summary, Legion of Honor was a fairly enjoyable experience. On a completely arbitrary scale, I give it a B+.  Yay California!